I’ve been (albeit as-slow-as-molasses-in-winter slowly) plugging away at writing a novel this month for nanowrimo (see nanowrimo.org if you’re curious and have never heard of this month of crazy literary abandon). I’ve also been working on several pieces that I want to enter into the North Vancouver Arts Council’s Annual Anonymous Art Show (my first time was last year–what great fun it is to see hundreds of 8×8 pieces of art work in all varieties of styles side-by-side in groupings on four walls!).
However, I’m distracted this morning by something that “bubbled up” and won’t let me rest. Literally. I tried to get back to sleep this morning, thinking that getting up before the alarm clock (which was set to buzz me awake at 6 a.m.) was just wrong and I turned over and attempted to fall back asleep but couldn’t. And I couldn’t focus on either my novel or my paintings this morning, so here I am, with my tall mug o’ coffee, writing this instead.
The last several weeks I’ve been listening to Gregg Braden’s CDs (I have four of his books on CD) and yesterday I finished the final one, entitled The Spontaneous Healing of Belief. Much of the material in these books is repetitive (to each other) and also not anything ground shatteringly new, per se. However, coupled with the telling of his own stories and personal experiences related in them, they are such a powerful source of inspiration for me. I listen to them and feel the field.. the interconnectedness of all things. It puts me into a state of grace, which is, what I think, what we all strive for in our lives.
I read a Facebook post the other day in which one of my Facebook friends was discussing love… the different variants of love and which was better or worse. He spoke of a man who had been a prisoner and was regularly tortured by his captor but who, under these horrible conditions, came to transform the hatred and resentment that he may have held toward his captor into love. His captor’s relationship to the victim was also transformed by virtue of this love, and he was eventually released. Now I’m not saying that we need to form unhealthy relationships with people just so that we can experience this dynamic (unless it is your soul’s will to do so) but that learning and understanding how to sink into grace is the key to happiness, and even love, perhaps.
This sinking into grace doesn’t mean giving up on any dreams or aspirations. In fact, I think it enhances their potential. It doesn’t mean that we are “settling” for something which is unsatisfactory for us. It means that we are in deep gratitude for what is in this moment and we continue to move toward what brings our heart and soul contentment even as we give thanks for all of the things which are present right now, regardless of whether they are exactly as we might wish them to be. As the Rolling Stones song says… you can’t always get want you want… but if you try sometimes, you just might find you get what you need.
The one thing that every “enlightened” soul seems to embody is a sense of immeasurable joy… it is a constant state with them. They have tapped into this state of grace and are able to keep the line open and flowing, regardless of the circumstances in which they find themselves. Sometimes we get in our own way. I have been trying, ever so slowly, to get out of mine.
We are between Canadian Thanksgiving and U.S. Thanksgiving and so in this moment I am giving thanks for all of the things, sometimes perceived as good, sometimes not so much, which are manifesting in my life – now… yesterday… tomorrow… always. I wish that each and every one of you discover your state of grace.