As is evident from my recent posts, I’m at a rather disillusioned juncture. I have not been feeling creative in the least, though I haven’t tried very hard to poke at the dying embers either, but rather feel like I’m in a “gathering” stage right now, wanting to read, absorb, and well, rest… gather energy for the next phase.
I’ve reached a point in my spiritual journey where traditional religion seems archaic and unreasonable, illogical, even, while the new age stuff seems all teddy bears and rainbows… all fluff and no substance… a backlash of the overuse of psychedelic drugs in the last several decades of the twentieth century. Everyone wants a panacea without the work (kind of like my wanting to lose a quarter of my body weight without changing my eating habits or exercising). I’ve been struggling with judgement lately… self-judgement… the judgement of others… letting others’ energy pollute my soul. I’ve been struggling with trying to free myself of the thickness of the “air” around me at the office while trying to keep from rationalizing others’ actions, or passing judgement. It’s a difficult task… perhaps once I’ve finally mastered this state, I’ll finally be free of it… free to move on to other things… hopefully closer to my soul’s journey.
I just finished reading The Alchemist by Paolo Coehlo today, which fits nicely with the past-life regression session that I attended yesterday at Awakenings in Laguna Hills. It’s been some time since I’ve attended any sort of “innerwork” session, and I’ve been feeling quite stale spiritually. Again, the word disillusioned comes to mind.
I stopped to chat with one of my co-workers on Friday afternoon before heading out and she asked me if I wanted to accompany her to this past-life regression session. I wasn’t sure whether I wanted to go, and even less whether I really wanted to participate. The following morning we missed each other’s calls and I ended up at the bookstore without my co-worker, still not sure whether I was going to take part in this session. Participants were starting to filter in, but the facilitator hadn’t shown up yet. Then, Fabienne arrived, dressed in purple, toting a purple pillow and blanket, and I was just about convinced to stay. It was after I exchanged a few words with her (in French) that clinched it. It was an omen, and I decided to take the journey, whether I thought I was ready or not.
I’ve done quite of bit of soul work in the past, everything from “awakening the child-within” sessions to shamanic soul retrieval journeying, so this concept was not a new one to me. One can take it literally or symbolically, though what matters most is the end result: discovering what it is that is impeding the soul’s progress.
In any case, many years ago I’d also read Many Lives, Many Masters: The True Story of a Prominent Psychiatrist, His Young Patient, and the Past Life Therapy That Changed Both Their Lives by Brian Weiss, during a time when I was fully immersed in my new age research. Amongst many books on reincarnation, I’d also read Past Live, Future Loves by Dick Sutphen. At the time of my father’s passing, the book that helped me deal with my loss the most was Ecstasy Is a New Frequency by Chris Griscom. If you are familiar with Shirley Maclaine’s writings then you will recognize Chris as the acupuncturist who assisted Shirley with the solid reconnection to her higher self, and took her through many of her past lives via an acupuncture technique called “windows to the sky.”
And so… enter quantum physics and the “new” sciences. Several years ago I picked up a book by Lynne Mctaggart entitled “The Field: The Quest for the Secret Force of the Universe.” This was my “a-ha” moment… tangible “evidence” that what the mystics and sages have been saying for millenia has now become measurable… or close to it. Yesterday I also picked up Ervin Laszlo’s Science and the Akaskic Field: An Integral Theory of Everything, which goes along similar lines.
So, to get back to my story–I enjoyed my regression session and though I found that it was not quite as profound as it could have been, I was able to grant permission to my self to release some old patterns of behaviour that is keeping me from fulfilling what Paulo Coehlo calls in his book The Alchemist my Personal Legend. And so, to my soul I say: Godspeed!